Old Job

Today is Wednesday and I only have a day and a half left at a job I've come to very much dislike, which had at a point become incredibly difficult. It became a little easier, once I started looking intensely for other, more gainful, forms of employment. I can't even express how much easier it has become to be at work, since I actually quit.

I don't want to say that all of my experiences at Behavioral Tech have been negative and certainly even some of the ones I didn't enjoy have been of a formative (informative?) nature. Last summer, I was unemployed for about three months and it was less than ideal. The temporary job with Btech came to me and I was really, really pleased to accept the offer. The job there was always kind of tenuous and I often felt unsure of how to interact with the people in the office. Over time, though, I went through what seemed a ridiculous and kind of unfair interview process and was after a semi-prolonged period of time, and after a holiday, so that they didn't have to pay me for it, an offer was made for a full-time, permanent position.

I have a number of stories to tell about moments that made me ask myself, "WTF, mate?," but I did learn a lot.

I learned to be quiet. I learned to sit out of view of the most hostile person in the office, whenever possible. I learned to avoid direct contact with particular people. I refined my skills of not seeing those I would rather not see. I practiced looking at someone's eyebrows when I wanted to pretend to, but not actually, make eye contact- supposedly, people can't tell the difference. And I learned to put up with my job, until I could find a better place to go. Sometimes, your full-time job becomes your part-time job while you seek other employment.

I went around this week and last, telling the people I really appreciate how I feel. I told Helen that I think she has genuine warmth. I told Cynthia that I think she's pretty amazing. I let Donny know that I appreciated all of his help and companionship. I let Susan know that she was the source of the warmest and most sincere encouragement I ever received at Btech. I told Shari that I would miss her. And Tricia knows that I'm sorry to miss the opportunity to know her better, since she's coming on just as I leave.

Even though my list of acquired skills may have sounded sarcastic, I do think I'm taking away a lot of things that will make me more successful in the future. Increased skills, knowledge and tolerance of office politics will be useful anywhere I go. Hopefully, I've learned my lesson about getting emotionally involved in work goings on.

Thanks to the people at Btech who were helpful and supportive. On to different, higher-paying, and hopefully, though not necessarily, better things.

Better Than Before

Whenever I stop to think about my life, I marvel at how much better it is than it ever was before.

I should stop to think about my life more often.